“Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Or can a man walk on hot coals, and his feet not be scorched?” (Proverbs 6:23-29, NASB)

Have you heard of the saying, “If you play with fire, you’re going to get burned?” It suggests that engaging in dangerous, risky, or immoral activities will eventually lead to negative consequences. Today’s reading reminded me of this saying. It says,

“For the commandment is a lamp, and the teaching is light; and reproofs for discipline are the way of life, to keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her catch you with her eyelids. For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, and an adulteress hunts for the precious life. Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Or can a man walk on hot coals, and his feet not be scorched? So is the one who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; whoever touches her will not go unpunished.”

Fire is a good thing when it is in the right place. It can give us warmth. We can cook food from it. We can use it to boil water and sanitize it. We can even use it to signal for help as it can be seen from far away. On the other hand, fire can harm us when it is in the wrong place. It can burn down a house or even an entire city. If it is not controlled, it can spread and cause damage. It can cost people’s lives.

The Bible often uses fire as a symbol of God’s approval or judgment. It is one way God shows He is pleased with people’s worship. God accepted the offerings of faithful worshipers by fire from heaven. For example, God accepted the worship offerings of Gideon, Solomon, and Elijah. God also used it to show His disapproval and brought judgment. For example, God judged Aaron’s sons, Nadab and Abihu, for offering strange fire, and killed them with fire. He also judged the entire cities of Sodom and Gomorrah with fire from heaven. In the future, God will use fire to judge mankind as it will destroy heaven and earth (2 Pet.3:10), and our works will be judged for rewards (1 Cor.3:12-15). Finally, God will cast unbelievers who rejected His gospel of grace into the Lake of Fire that burns forever (Rev.20:14-15).

In today’s reading, Solomon used fire as an illustration of sex gone wrong. Sex is a good thing when it’s practiced in the right relationship. Anything outside of marriage will harm you like a fire that is out of control. Sexual sin is like a fire that will destroy us. If you play with it, you’re going to get “burned,” “scorched,” and “punished.” Even if you avoid its natural consequences, it will destroy you through God’s judgment. Verse 29 is clear on this as it says, “So is the one who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; whoever touches her will not go unpunished.” Passion for sex and its pleasure must be kept under control, that is, within a marriage relationship. Failure to do so will lead to ruin. It will reduce your life to “a loaf of bread.” In other words, illicit sex can ruin you financially and socially. You will be left with the bare minimum for survival. Even if you can escape its natural consequences, you cannot escape God’s punishment. Hebrews 13:4 says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”

The truth is that the desire for sexual intimacy burns within each of us, and it is a good thing. We know this because God created us and gave us desires. However, He gave us this blessing so that we can enjoy it in a marriage relationship. Apostle Paul says, “But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn” (1 Cor.7:9). Here is a man who loved God and wanted to serve Him wholeheartedly, so he committed to a celibate life. He was able to keep his “fire” under control. However, he also knew that not everyone can keep it under control, so he told people to get married. When the fire of sexual intimacy is kept within marriage, it is like having a fireplace and a cooking stove in a home. Everything in the house is safe, and you can enjoy the warmth of a fire when you want to and cook food when you’re hungry. Don’t play with fire—keep it under control and enjoy its benefits.

• Why did Solomon liken sexual intimacy to a fire?
• How would you advise people to handle “burning with lust” without compromising their walk with God?